It has been over five years since we lost you. When we found out we were having twins, we were so excited, overwhelmed and scared. From one of the very first ultrasounds, I was concerned that you were measuring smaller. The doctors tried to reassure me appointment after appointment and I tried to believe them…
Two grieving mothers seek efforts to bring transparency, safety to college abroad programs Ros Thackurdeen remembers the hype as she sat through a college study abroad session with her youngest son Ravi at Swarthmore University. “It was pretty exciting,” Thackurdeen said. “I wanted to go on it. You had students who talked about their experiences…
“Your life is a box, and this grief is a box inside that box, and it’s occupying a large portion of it. And as life continues, the bigger box gets bigger and that grief, it doesn’t change in size. It’s still there, but there’s just more room in your life, other aspects of it.” —…
Don’t Lean Into The Brokeness Nearly three years ago the nation’s attention was gripped by the shooting death of Michael Brown, a young black man who was shot by Darren Wilson, a white police officer. As unrest unfolded in Ferguson, larger questions about racial inequities and institutional racism began making headlines. Today, police shootings…
“Don’t ever allow what other people say or think about your pain to keep you from allowing yourself to feel it. Because the only way you’re going to get through this is to feel it and process it. It’ll get better. You’ll always miss your baby. I’ll always miss my baby, but I do have…
“I’m not the same as I used to be. I don’t think I ever will be. If that doesn’t change how I am with Chris I mean I think it has to change how I am with Chris because I’m different.” — Gina
Matt and Roya Pilcher were among the millions of Americans who slogged dutifully through the process of filing their taxes in 2011. But that year they joined countless other bereaved parents in experiencing pain far beyond the inconvenience of paperwork. Not only had they lost their daughter Ava; the IRS subsequently informed them their claim…
There is a hole that has been ripped into my heart, my womb, my core, in my entire being, that will never heal. You can’t seal that. You can’t duplicate it, can’t replace it, can’t imitate it; it’s gone. The one little person that I did everything for, made every choice and decision for, did…
“That’s when we knew. He didn’t have to say anything. That was how the news was broken.” — Gavin
Even the Forgotten Lose Children Countless experiences shape the trajectory of a human life, but for Maryam Henderson-Uloho the convergence of two specific and devastating events ultimately changed her course: a 25-year prison sentence and the death of her son, Augustine. Maryam was serving her sentence at St. Gabriel’s Louisiana Correctional Institution for Women when…
“I get up and I’m like, ‘Today I’m going to do this.’ Momo couldn’t stay here for me, but I’m doing my best to walk it out in a way that maybe a young person that I talk to or they see me smiling even if I’m crying and just keep going and maybe it’ll…
“The disbelief always felt like a bad dream. I was either in a coma somewhere or I was in a deep sleep and this was such a realistic dream. And, I thought and I hoped that one day I was going to wake up and it wasn’t not going to be real at all.” —…
“I never in a million years imagined myself telling my baby to let go. This is the baby that I fought to keep in so she wouldn’t be born early, but…” — Kimmie
Federal Child Safety Protection Laws Are Not Enforced Equally By States Serving her country was the first thing Betsy Cummings would do following graduation. Leaving her small hometown of Culpeper, Virginia, she was off to see the world, meet her future husband, and eventually welcome her young son, Dylan, into the world. Following maternity leave,…
“Those early days were just a fog of confusion, uncertainty, a little bit of anger and just trying to wrap your head around a new reality…It was something that you could never prepare yourself for.” — Gavin
Most Employers Grant Only Three Days Of Paid Leave After A Child Dies There are times in which an entire life can change in a moment. It may come in the form of an anxiously anticipated milestone: graduation, marriage, or the birth of a child. But there are darker, unimaginable tragedies we often refuse…
Bryan Burgess (center) was killed in action during his final 2011 deployment to Afghanistan just 16 days before he was scheduled to return home — a few weeks shy of his 30th birthday. His parents Terry and Beth created Gold Star Parents retreat and network in his honor. Grieving Bryan, their son who gave all, Texas parents Terry and…
Dear Kiki – It’s okay no one understands why I was so upset this morning. Dad and Johnny don’t get it – perhaps the male mind can compartmentalize easily – they accept that you’re gone. Today I took stuff out of your room, the way I had set your things up, because dad is going…
Kelly Farley and Barry Kluger are the dads behind the Parental Bereavement Act. Evermore is dedicating this Father’s Day week to bereaved dads who will always be fathers. Kelly Farley and Barry Kluger met because of a horrible coincidence: They knew what it was like to mourn a child. For Kluger, it was his 18-year-old…
I don’t even know where to begin. In 1987, when I was 20, I was in a bad car accident. My 3-year-old daughter, who was with me, was shaken up and had two black eyes, but otherwise seemed all right. Someone called my parents and my mom took me to the hospital. I was 38…
In June 2013, during recovery from what was supposed to be a routine heart catheterization to assess his heart condition, Ron Kelly’s son’s heart failed. Doctors weren’t able to revive 16-year-old Jon. Today Ron helps other grieving fathers, particularly those in the workplace. After struggling with identity after his son’s death, Ron Kelly helps other…
“The pain will always be, always be there. It will never go away. However, as each day passes, you will learn how to, not deal with it, but it’ll become a little easier to handle. The pain will not be as sharp as it might be right now but as each day goes along, you’ll…
Bryan Burgess was killed in action during a 2011 deployment to Afghanistan just 16 days before he was scheduled to return home — a few weeks shy of his 30th birthday. Telling and re-telling the story of his son’s life and sacrifice pulled Terry Burgess from deep depression In the early morning hours before Terry Burgess learned…
“He was one of the initial responders and he just kept holding my hand. He was like, ‘Miss Hawkins, I’ve been in Iraq. Your son, he’s going to be okay.’” — Judy
Evermore is dedicating this Father’s Day week to bereaved dads who will always be fathers. In a new memoir, Once More We Saw Stars, father Jayson Greene vividly recounts the raw feelings after his two-year-old daughter Greta died and his continuous journey through grief. A stunning accident claimed the life of two-year-old Greta Greene in…
Evermore is dedicating this Father’s Day week to bereaved dads who will always be fathers. After his son Reid died in a car crash, Tim Hollister helped transform Connecticut’s teen driving laws. The provisions include earlier curfews, no electronic devices, a two-hour teen driving safety course for both teens and their parents and restrictions on…
Kevin, fierce protector of his nine siblings and Nancy and Ray’s son. A Bereaved Mother’s Day Nancy is the unflappable mother of ten and leads her large family with grace, instilling a deep love for life in all her children. As a psychotherapist who specializes in addiction and trauma, she has a soft spot for people…
Mulheron left her career to immerse herself in the science surrounding the fallout of losing a child at any age or cause. She then started Evermore — a nonprofit to change the national response when a child dies. Evermore organization will tackle why and how More. Bereaved. Families. Every day, news coverage reports the death of sons and…
“Why is a chaplain here?’ She just rolled off the bed. Then when I saw the first doctor before I was able to see Kayla, she said, ‘If she survives,’ and I didn’t hear anything after that.” — Tonya
“What if I would have done this? Then they would still be alive today.” — Jackie
“It’s happened four times for me now. It’s been a long time, when I woke up in that morning going, “I have to get the kids up from school.” Oh…she’s not there. That’s only happened four times but you know what, as bad as the realization is, that one minute that she’s still there is…
“He was one of the initial responders and he just kept holding my hand. He was like, ‘Miss Hawkins, I’ve been in Iraq. Your son, he’s going to be okay.’” — Judy
Grief teaches a mother lessons she never wanted to learn My husband Brad came home to tell me what he had learned minutes earlier. Sarah is gone… Our Sarah-Grace. Our beautiful 24-year-old daughter. Dead. With three words and within mere seconds, I was shattered, gutted, disoriented. Any word that implies destruction, pain or confusion is…
A Reflection by Catherine T I thought I was in a dream, a nightmare, would I ever wake up? My plane never landed in Italy, but crashed on the runway in Holland. She was sick, there were no answers, in the end: not enough oxygen to her brain. Her father stood helplessly watching, praying, while…
